Thanks for your wedding advice and input! No doubt I will be bugging you along the way for more. :) It is overwhelming, and I knew it would be at times, but the sticker shock is way worse than I ever thought it would be. Blah.
No problem! Hopefully I wasn’t too verbose or overbearing there. I just remember (and always will) the problems with the money, and how that was the FIRST and LAST thing (and much in between) we dealt with, fought about, cried about, worried about… you get the idea. :) BUT, I will say that it did all work out in the end and, I will say that if I could do it again, I would worry about it less because it does all truly work out.
As you say, if you love the venue, the price is pretty non-negotiable. But have you thought about a Friday wedding? My best friend did a Friday wedding and saved a lot of money. Also, consider your entree options and, like I said, maybe a cash bar. Also, as much as it sucks, cutting down your guest list is really the best way to save. If this venue is important to you, go for it; you won’t regret it. You’ll just have to save elsewhere.
My final piece of advice (for now ;) ) is to be SUPER ORGANIZED. Keep all receipts and bills, find a method that works for you for keeping track of spending, and budget like you’ve never budgeted before. Keep track of every single penny spent on this wedding. Get your fiance’s help with this, too. Even if you already live together, you will be astonished at how planning this wedding helps your budgeting skills in real life, too. :)
I don’t know what your timeline is, but keep in mind, too, that you usually don’t have to pay for everything up front, which really does give you time to prepare and save. And I don’t know where you live, but if you shop around, you can find really great deals on things like cake and photographers. Or you can do what we did and use friends and family for a lot of it, which makes everything feel more personal AND saves you money.
The point I’m trying to get across, though, in all these words, is that it will work out, and your wedding will be beautiful and wonderful and everything you want, no matter how much you spend. :)
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The ACLU is suing a school for making kids take off their “I <3 boobies” bracelets? I hate those things. They are offensive and teaching kids fake activism. I always make my students take them off. Uh oh.
“It requires, for a woman, usually in today’s world still, an extra amount of effort because I think it’s - the fact that women are still sometimes judged more critically. If you are in the courtroom or you are presenting a case, it still is a fact - and this is not just in Kyrgyzstan, this is everywhere - that when a man walks into a courtroom it’s rare for someone to say, “Oh, look what he is wearing.” (Laughter.) But if you walk into a courtroom, or any young woman walks into a courtroom, people are going to notice. And that will be an additional requirement that you have to meet.”